Friday, 20 June 2008

I finish Uni in a few days. Actually I am kind of finished just waiting for my results which will hopefully be good enough.

I am supposed to be packing and I just can't seem to do anything. I keep feeling overwhelmed. The end of three years, meeting new people, knowing new people. Some become friends and others don't. This place has been my escape for the past 3 years. I always run here and hide when I am trying to avoid my family or whatever. I have been lucky to be in one of the good unis that happens to be outside london. The place is often refered to as a village and I love it that way.

I am not ready to leave. I started packing, started playing my Sarah Mclachlan Mirrorball album and I have to keep fighting this urge to burst into tears.

In my three years here, I have learnt so much. I have made so many mistakes, made friends, lost friends. I think I have discovered who I am and the person I want to be.

I also realise that it is time to leave my little bubble and step into the real world. I have to face reality at some point and stop running. I have to leave a lot of junk behind in this place and start afresh. Take the good stuff I have learnt and leave behind the excess baggage.

We had our final party last night and I totally forgot it was also time for Goodbyes. I won't see a lot of people once we leave this place and I should have said Goodbye but I just forgot.

I just hope I keep the good friends I have made despite the distance or whatever.

I know God has blessed me in so many ways that I can only be thankful to him for his mercies. He has shown me so much and given me strength even when I forgot to call on him, his love has been constant.

okay, now I have to go back to packing.